D-Funk Warrens blog

So I gave my two weeks notice today to my boss here at Clearwire and the angels cried out HALLELUJAH!!! Many of you might not know this but I pretty much hated my job these past 2 months. Let me break it down for you as to why i hated it: (sweet I actually got to use a semicolon!) You see, in a sales position your main job is to sell. Sounds easy right? well its not so easy when you are selling internet in a mall. people dont go to the mall to get signed up for internet. Also, our service is limited by its coverage area so not everyone can get it and if they are in the coverage area, there is no guarantee that they will get a good solid signal. despite all these factors working against me, i was still able to be top salesman of the month of january, which you can imagine, took a lot of work. I was pushing and pulling and using every salesman lingo i could think of to get these sales. So every night i would come home and just be emotionally drained and my knees/back would be killing me from standing all day so you can imagine this was effecting my home life. I wouldnt want to do anything when i got home and i had things i needed to do like clean the house, run errands, etc. so now not only am i pushing hard at work but i am stressed out when i get home. anywho, i made it as the top salesman in the month of january and what did i get as a reward? a pat on the back and a "Now what could you have done more to get 60 sales last month" or a "We better see those numbers next month". ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? I just worked my booty off every day for this company and all i got was a, you coulda done better? I dont know about you but to me that just doesnt seem right. atleast show me some appreciation and respect. but instead i get bosses who talk crap about me behind my back to other employees (i know cause those employees are my friends). I realized that it isnt worth it to have a job where no matter how much you pour into it, it doesnt pour back. Its a one way street where i am at right now, always taking and never giving. So basically i called my good friend Adam up and was like, get me out of here! he pulled his magic and on May 6th I will be starting my new job over at Eastside Harley.

I say all this to remind you all not to ever settle for a job that doesnt pour back into you especially if you work hard. Now if you are just lazy and dont ever do anything at work, expect the same from them, they will be lazy and never do anything for you. But if you actually pour your time and energy into it, you should atleast be rewarded with the respect of your higher ups. I find that often we feel like there is nothing else out there for us. This is my second job i have ever had. I worked for my dads business for about 11 years and i remember when i quit that i was like, uhhh so now what do i do? then i found this job with clearwire and i honestly felt stuck here. I think we as humans get afraid of making a job change because it has many effects on us. A job change doesnt just effect you as a person but it effects many aspects of your life. Your commute might get longer, your hours will be different, you gotta start a new routine, you gotta learn a new trade, etc. there are many factors that are involved when we acquire a new job but i think one of the most important factors is if the job will make us happy. I know that if i am not happy at work, it is hard to be happy at home after work. My wife is the most important person in my life and if my job is causing me to effect our relationship in a negative way, you better believe i will do whatever it takes to get rid of that job and find a new one. We get so caught up in our position that we have or how much we are making that we forget about the most important stuff in our lives: our family. Parents, if your job requires so much of your time that you cant make it to your kids sports events, ballet recitals, school play, or whatever they are involved in, find a new job. We can always make more money but we cant ever get back lost time with our family or kids. Now im not telling you to quit your job and go broke just to spend more time at home but make a serious effort to look at other options. All it took for me was to make a call to a friend and now i will be making just as much money if not more and i will have wayyyyy better hours. I will be home every night at around 6 and i know i wont be as drained. I could go on forever about this kind of stuff so i will stop here. I hope this helps someone out. Just remember that our time is the one commodity that we cant get back so spend it wisely.

Peace,

D

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Blue Tooths....Cell phone ease or fasion statement. We have all seen it. The business man or woman walking down the street with their bluetooth in and they arent even talking on it and we say, "wow, they must be important." I think people are abusing this technology by saying, "hey! today i want to look like i know about technology so i am going to rock my bluetooth, even when i am not on the phone." So I am here today to lay down some rules about bluetooths and their proper use. You see, I work at the mall and one of my biggest pet peeves is people walking through the mall with their bluetooth in and they arent even using it, let alone do they have anything in their hands warranting the need for a hands free headset. Now i can understand if they are at work and their job requires them to be hands free when they are on the phone but come on, while you are out with your friends shopping, you dont need to have your bluetooth in. Nothing gets me more annoyed then when i am trying to talk to someone and they randomly walk off talking on their bluetooth. I didnt hear a phone ring but they did cause the headset makes a little doodly doo noise in your ear. atleast have the courtesy to take the bluetooth out while not in use and if you recieve a call, throw it in real quick. It isnt that hard to pull the little object out of your pocket and place it in your ear, heck you can even push the button to answer the call as you get it situated in there. Another thing that the social bluetoother will do that is just plain rude is walk up to you and be on the phone and then try and carry a conversation with you and the person on the phone at the same time. I personally hate when this happens, whether i am the person on the other end of the call or the person trying to have a face to face conversation with them. another one is the one where they walk up and say something like, "yeah i will be there at 6." and i am looking around like, cool? see you there? then they hit me with a, "no, i was on my bluetooth (in a cool, i am a business man tone)" so then i stand there waiting for them to get done and then all of a sudden he is asking me questions and i am standing there not responding cause i didnt see him get off the phone. that one really gets me. not only is it just annoying to try and guess if he is talking to me yet or not but it also makes me look like an idiot as i stand there not knowing what to do as this person stares at me and talks into a tiny headset. So let me lay down some rules for you avid bluetooth users:

1. Do not wear your bluetooth while inside a building, unless you are working at said building and that building houses a business that deals in technology such as a Best Buy and you wear the bluetooth to look more "techy" so people will trust you no matter what your answer to their question about their computer is.

2. Do not wear your bluetooth in your right ear as you drive your car. This makes it so as people drive by you and you are just talking away, you look like you are talking to yourself. Rock that puppy in the left ear so that people know you are on the phone as they drive by.

3. Do not wear your bluetooth while out to dinner or hanging out at a friends house. Leave it in your pocket until you recieve a call then pull it out and place it in your ear then commence conversation. once the phone conversation is over, remove the headset and replace it in your pocket informing everyone around you that you are finished with your phone call and are ready to proceed with whatever it was you were doing.

4. DO NOT WEAR YOUR BLUETOOTH IN THE MOVIE THEATRE. I payed $9 to see a film, i dont want to constently see a flashing blue light 4 rows down from me, besides, if you did answer your phone call during the movie, you would also be recieving what is left of the contents in my popcorn bucket. Please be polite and just put the bluetooth away during the film. if you are expecting a call, sit somewhere where you can quickly exit the theatre and have your phone conversation in the lobby (I would never throw my popcorn at someone, i just like to sound tough).

If you abide by these rules you will ensure that your bluetooth usage wont be frowned upon by those around you. If you have any further questions about what is acceptable or unacceptable while using a Bluetooth, please feel free to post your question and I will try to answer it in a timely fashion.

GOODNIGHT!

So it starts out a little cheesy but man it gets sooooo good. makes you really think about Gods love.

So I recently discovered (by recent I mean like right now as I'm typing this) that I can blog from my phone! So now no matter where I am I can post something that I'm thinking about! Pretty cool huh? So be watching for more phlogs (phone blogs, in case you didn't catch that in the title) from me. They will most likely just be about random things.

Peace,
D

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So I was talking to some friends the other day and we got into a conversation about apostrophes and how we really dont need them. See even right there I spelt dont without one and you all know what I was saying. Just because I put "Do" and "Not" together doesnt mean i have to use an apostrophe. Who even came up with that rule? You see, the apostrophe key on this laptop im using decides to work or not work depending on how it feels at the moment so its a real hassle for me to just be cruising typing away and have to push that key like 3098309 times just to get it to make one little itty bitty mark. I mean does it make that much of a difference? Honestly, right now, stop reading and think about it. We all know what someone is trying to say even without the apostrophe. Sooooooooo I decided to boycott apostrophes. I will no longer be using apostrophes in any of my blogs (unless im on mozilla firefox because that web browser often auto inserts the apostrophe for certain words and its even more of a hassle to try and turn off auto correct because then it wont auto capitalize, you see i am very lazy when i type, i dont even like pushing shift to capitalize things). Please join me in this effort to show the mighty apostrophe that we are no longer bound by its conformist ways. It no longer has control over our cants, donts, wonts, aints, and many other words that it seems to think it owns. I thank you to those who are going to be joining the ranks of the UPAA (United People Against Apostrophes) and to those who still feel the need to us an apostrophe, we at the UPAA will do our best to liberate you from the apostrophes reign of terror. Apostrophes be warned! Your time has come to face the music and its some Heavy Metal Rock! (side note, anyone know where they got the term: time to face the music? Well I do!)

Story Time! You see, back in the day an emperor of i think China or somewhere around there, loved music and he had many paid musicians that lived and ate amazing food in his palace and all they had to do was come together and play music for him. Well this street bum was starving one day and noticed a group of the emperors musicians walking down the road living the good life so he thought up a plan. He got all cleaned up and scrounged up some money to get clean clothes and buy himself an instrument. He then snuck into the palace and proceeded to live there as a musician. When they would go to play for the emperor, he would simply fake like he was playing and because there were so many musicians, no one could tell. BUT! the emperor decided he wanted a solo from each musician so he sent out a notice for them to write him a song and then perform it by themselves. The bum couldnt play a note let a lone a whole song so he started to freak out because his gig was up. So as the day grew near (never understood how a day could grow, let alone grow near....) he ended up killing himself because he would rather die then face the music. True story.

Back from our rabbit trail, I hearby declare war on all apostrophes! People of the Blogmunity (Blog community) rally together and we can win this war of attricion against this little mark that thinks it is so powerful. all it does is separate one letter from the rest of the word, even without it the word is still readable, sheesh. stupid apostrophe....

Your Commander in Arms,

General D.P. Warren

My sisters and I

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Yeah the title is from a song in case you were wondering. Soooooo....guess what? MY SISTER SARAH IS BACK AND I AM REALLY EXCITED ABOUT THAT!!! You see, she left Monroe, WA many moons ago to go stay with Pastor Al and Joanie over in Orville, WA. Dont ask me where Orville is because I have no clue. I heard basically you drive east until you get to the middle of nowhere then you take a left and drive some more and WHAM! you are in Orville. But yeah, back to the point, she went over there to get away from some stuff and to build her relationship with God. It was a really hard decision for her to make because she had to leave all her friends and family behind but it was the right decision to make. By doing this, it allowed her to focus on her relationship with God and not have any distractions (yeah like Pastor Al isnt a distraction). But she is back and badder then before(in a good way)!

(New paragraph just for Tristan) I am soooooo proud of my sister. She made this decision to leave everyone behind on her own and she really used that time to do some soul searching and get some things figured out about herself. She now has her own identity in Christ and is building on that identity daily. I cant wait to see what God has in store for her life. Her testimony is amazing! I cant wait to see her speak on it in front of people and just the power that it will carry. Sarah has this ability to speak to people in such a relevant manner that no matter what walk of life they come from, they understand exactly what she is talking about. I cant wait to get to experience this new life that she is choosing to live and I know that she is gonna change some peoples lives. So big shout out to my sister Sarah! You are a blessing and you taught this young man many things about life. I love you with all my heart and I cant wait to watch your ministry unfold.

P.S. To all of you grammar oriented people reading this, im writing this at work and the apostrophe key on this keyboard doesnt seem to be working so that is why my cants, donts, arents, ims, uhhhh and many other conjoined words (thats what you call them right?) are lacking the apostrophes that should be with them. I apologize and I hope this doesnt disued you from further viewings of my blog. Good day.

So I want to tell you all about something really really cool that happened to me the other day. So I'm at Ryan and Jenny's playing some Guitar Hero 3 and I'm shredding away when i get a phone call from my lovely wife, Sarah: "Hey there sugar lumps!" I say as I answer the phone, "You will never believe what just happened" She replies. "I just got off he phone with Roger Habich....But before I go on with my conversation with Sarah how about a little back story on what she is about to tell me. *Que wavy screen telling you we are going back a couple months* It was a bright winter day as I drove into work around 2pm. On my way I started to hear my car make a knocking noise, now, my first car was destroyed because I failed to put oil in it...ever...so yeah, it threw a rod and went to a junk yard. But! I actually cared for this car that I was driving on ths bright winter day and I had just recently put oil it 2 weeks prior to this bright winter day. I knew that the old rice rocket (my honda that I was in) had been burning oil lately but I didnt know the severity of the burningness. Anyways! As I heard this knocking sound I immediatly knew that it wasnt a good noise so i proceeded to merge towards an exit. in the process of merging, my engine made a click click bang! noise and then stopped running. So there I was, coasting to a dead stop on the shoulder of I405 North on my way to work. As I came to a stop, I was extremely angry at my car and I wanted to get out and beat the living headlights out of it (get it, normally it's beat the living daylights out, but it's a car and has headlights...man i crack myself up). But while sitting there, I remember all the bad things that had happened to me in the past and how I always ended up better off after them. I remembered that I am a blessed and highly favored child of God and that my needs are fulfilled by Him, so that anger turned into laughter. Long story short i get it towed back to my house and while at a music practice i tell my fellow singers what had happened and Roger Habich asks if he could buy the car from me so he can just rebuild the engine and have a nice little commuter car. I told him if he can tow it out of my parking spot at my house he can just have it. Every week at music practice I would talk to him about the car and he would get excited about the stuff he was doing to it like fixing the body kit, putting a new clutch in it, etc. and about how he couldnt wait to get it up and going. So now let's cut back to 2 days ago as i'm on the phone with Sarah. she had said you will never believe this yadda yadda, "I just got off the phone with Roger Habich and he said that the honda is running great and it's all fixed and he is stopping by to give it back to us." is what she said to me. I stood there in disbelief on the phone asking her if she was serious, over and over and every time i asked she responed with a yes. I couldnt believe it! the car that I had loved for years died on me and my family and I had a funeral for it and rememebered story after story about the "Rice Rocket". I never thought I would get to drive it again and then just like that, it is resurected and back in my hands because of a selfless act of generousity and being obedient to God. I can't thank Roger Habich enough, he truly blessed me and my wife. I know that he expects nothing in return but I also know that God blesses a cheerful giver. so to Roger and his wife Shanna, I just want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart. The car looks great and is running like a champ. So from here on out, it's no longer the rice rocket but shall be known as Lazarus because it died and was brought back to life....clever huh?

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So about 4 months ago I acquired a job working for Clearwire as a retail salesman, well my official title is Retail Account Executive, sounds pretty professional huh? Anywho, when I first started working here at my kiosk I quickly discovered that people automatically do not like you when you work at a kiosk. If you have never been to the Alderwood Mall then you may not know the harassment that people recieve from ll the 100s of kiosks in this mall. There are cell phone guys who are just rude and overly aggressive, ladies who will just grab your hand and start doing your nails and putting lotion on you, people trying to sell you hair extensions, etc. so people are already annoyed with the kiosk workers before they even get close to where I work. Now i must admit that I have done my fair share of harassing people as they go by but usually the person was very rude to me so i feel the need to make them feel stupid for their rude act, I know i should just let it go like water under the bridge but about after the 4th middle finger that you get just for asking people how they are doing, it gets to ya (I think that was a run-on sentence but oh well, it's my blog so I make the rules!). Some days people dont even bother to acknowledge that I even exist as they walk by, I say "Hello sir how are you doing today?" and they just keep walking without even glancing over. Thats when I answer for him with a, "I'm doing just great Mr. Kiosk worker but I'm not going to acknowledge that you are a person because you are trying to sell things." which usually gets me a good response out of them or atleast a smile. My co-workers and I often try little games with people like pointing at the ground behind them like they dropped something then when they go to look at what they "dropped" we get close and ask them what kind of internet service do they have? This one has almost gotten me punched but hey, when you stand around doing nothing all day you find ways to entertain yourself or you wont survive. Another thing that I have to deal with constently is the annoying middle schoolers checking their myspace and the crying when the boy they like didnt accept their friend request. COME ON! There are far more important things in life then a boy accepting you as a friend on myspace. Basically I am writing this so that next time you are in a mall and you see a kiosk worker, atleast acknowledge that they exist, you dont have to buy from them, but atleast say "hello" or "good day shopkeep!" Also, dont buy the dead sea salt crap that they will try to sell you, it's pretty much just salt crystals ground up in water...